The music player to the right.....

..... has nine songs that we hear a lot on the French radio and I have grown to love them, and another song that I have never heard before until today, but it's called "Tu veux mon zizi?" - "Do you want my willy?". It's hilarious so take a listen!

Le Lycée Raoul Vadepied, Evron

This is where I work (thank you Google Maps)

(1) This is where I get dropped off in the morning. This is also where I wait for 20 or so minutes every day after I finish work, until Dave arrives. And lastly, this is where I have my cigarette break every hour or so, trying to avoid the 3ème (same age as year 10) who all pester for cigarettes.

(2) This is G building. I teach about half of my lessons in here. This is also contains the staffroom, where I spend a lot of time on Facebook. I am usually sat at the very bottom of the left bracket.

(3) This is J building. This is where everyone swears at me. Coincidently, this is also the vocational building. I teach the other half of my lessons in here.

(4) This is the canteen. I have very rarely been in the canteen because a) I sit with the teachers in their dining hall, and I can't tell what anyone's saying in French because there are loads of people talking loudly around me and I feel like a dick when I can't tell what they're saying and b) the food frightens me.

(5) This is the staff car park. This is where Dave could park should he be on time, but he doesn't because he's frightened of it.

Now I'm really French!

Just a short one. I had my French class today at 1. When we got back, we attacked the post box as there was some sort of catalogue style book stuck in it. After several minutes, we suceeded, and this is what we found...





It's a yellow pages!

And when you turn it over, it's a white pages with the residential phone numbers. Dave was adamant that our phone number wouldn't be in it, but voilà....



So now I feel like a fully integrated part of the community!

Lightbulb moment number 2

Thursday night, we went into Le Mans for a Soiree Concert (i.e a band night). I got drunk off cider as it is pretty much the only alcoholic drink I will touch in most French bars. I took Jordan out for a cigarette, and these two French men who were walking past asked us if the music was any good. The second I replied, they asked if I was English (we must have an easily identifiable accent when talking French).

Cigarette finished, went back in. But that was it. We were stuck then. Even though poor Jordan didn't know what he was saying, one of them continued trying to chat us both up whenever he saw us. I felt like Dave was trying to pimp me out, because every time the man said something to me, Dave would his, "go on, talk to him, practise French"!

I didn't feel very fresh when I got up at 7 on Friday morning after 4 and a half hours of sleep. And Dave was taking the mick out of me because I was so drunk off a glass of Asti and 2 and a half pints. But, as I said in my defence, I can drink as much as Jack! :P And to be fair, the only thing I drink at home in France is Martini Extra Dry, and that's like water to me now.

On Thursday day we had recieved a Post Office card for the B's, the people we rent the house off, saying that there was a letter that needed collecting. We needed identification though.

We asked Julie, and she said could we try to collect it, and explain that we live there? So Friday afternoon, we traipsed off to the Post Office. I explained the situation, explained that I had a bank statement, so I could prove that we lived at that address.

But the French love causing hassle where paperwork is concerned! The B's need to ring up the Post Office and get the Post Office to extend the normal 14 days that they will keep the letter before it gets sent away. And in the meantime, we need to get Julie to post the slip back to England so that they can sign the back, saying that we are allowed to collect it, then send it back. Then we can collect it.

But the important thing was (coz I don't give a flying fig about the letter, it's probably just an important bill, that we'll have to pay towards!), that I understood all of this perfectly, and managed to come up with a suitable response each time. It's the first time I've done something like that in France that I haven't felt like a complete and utter idiot. So I feel quite proud of myself!

Other matters - Dave has not had a French lesson since the first once. Technically he owes me six hours of French learning now. But he's very difficult to drag off his football game. The only French he uses is when he goes to the boulangerie and says "un pain s'il vous plait" "merci, au revoir".

And do you like my new layout? I spent ages playing around with new ideas. I think I'll keep this one for a while.

J'♥ le jeudi - je peut faire la grasse matinee!

I've just logged onto the the Orange.fr website to pay the phone bill this month, and it appears we're €1.16 in credit. I really don't understand the way they work their bills. The first month they charged us a lot, so I'm hoping it's not a mistake.

Dave keeps on insisting that we don't need to go back home in February half term 13 Feb - 1 March. He's worked out that we've already used about €400 worth of oil on the central heating that we need to pay before we leave. And going back costs a small fortune.

But we need to come home because we have too much stuff to fit in the car in one go, so we need to bring a lot of stuff back with us before we come home for good. And to be fair, if I'm off work for two weeks, we're gonna spend a lot of money no matter what country we're in.

So we can come home for half term, and we'll use the Easter holidays to explore France. I'd like to go to Paris again, but I don't think that's likely to happen, unless someone wants to visit us, and insists that we go with them (please someone!). I'd love to see the Palace of Versailles this time, and go all the way up the Eiffel Tower!

I had another French lesson on Monday. They are a great help in helping me to understand French when spoken really fast! I can understand a lot of things that are said to me now, but I can't make eye contact at the same time - I need to stare into space and pull a funny concentrating face!

Look at my pretty picture

Look at my beautiful new picture frame with the picture from the official Tour Eifel shop! It looks really "French" and shabby chic. This is how I'm gonna style my bedroom when I get home. Dave's not happy that the frame cost €5, but like everything else in France, picture frames are expensive. Plus it stopped me from splurging a lot more money on the Topshop website!





Today was OK. I'm getting better at defending myself against the naughtier pupils. I had a boy today, and every time I said something in French, he would take the mick out of my prononciation loudly. Repeatedly. I was starting to feel really awkward. So the next time he did it, I told him "I can speak better French than you can speak English, so don't laugh." (Maybe it sounds a bit mean, but it wasn't mean at all at the time)

There was another in the same class who kept on shouting "motherfucker" and "biatch" and grinning. I told him if he carried on, I would tell the proviseur (headteacher). This seems to frighten them, as he looked serious and said "I stop".

I mentioned it to his teacher at the end of the lesson when she asked how the groups had been. Turns out he's on report card. Ah well. At least it was in English!

Feed the birds, tuppence a bag

The snow is still here. Yesterday it snowed and hailed on top of the week old snow. However I think we've given up on the idea of making a snowman. I did want to make a French snowman with a beret and a moustache but unfortunatly I don't have a beret in this country. I might ask next door if I can borrow one...

Our new hobby is feeding the birds. We never eat the ends of the baguettes, in the past we have been binning them, but we now have started collecting them. Dave in particular has really taken to it, he loves watching the birds through the living room window. He's becoming a proper twitcher! "That one's a blue tit"








After my lesson on Monday, I tried to persuade Dave to go to the beginners French classes that a few members of my family attend. He tried to fob me off with an excuse about money which was absolute rubbish, he just doesn't want to put the work in! So instead we came to the compromise that that he would let me teach him an hour of French every day that I'm not at work. So today is the first day, and already he's umming and ahhing. I'm not trying to be mean, I just want him to come out of this with something to show for it. And he does enjoy it when he gets into it.

Update: Dave read this and it seemed to persuade him, as he has now had an hour AND TEN MINUTE French lesson!

: O The Christmas tree is still up

Today (edit: by today I mean Monday, this was posted after midnight) I went on my advanced French course - the one that Julie our estate agent goes on. I was really worried yesterday because she's much better than I am. But all was well.

There was Julie who is the best in the class, Dave her husband and two older ladies. The French lady who teaches us is called Bridgette (like Bridgette Bardot!). The class was about the right level and I learnt a lot. I'm looking forward to going back next week now.

Concerning other matters, the Christmas tree is still up. We didn't get to see it for 2 weeks at Christmas so we're getting out money's worth now! And it's not bad luck in France, loads of people still have their Christmas decorations up. Apparently a lot of people leave them up until Easter!

We have eaten quite well today. It's not a diet per se (the word diet makes me gorge chocolate even though I never usually eat chocolate) but I am not eating snacks. We are also going to start going for walks when the snow has melted.

Back to reality (almost)

Sorry about the huuuge gap since my last post, but to be fair, most of you have seen me over Christmas. Back to France now, and back to some sort of reality.

I found it more difficult to come back this time than last time at Halloween, probably because we were back for more than a fortnight. I sobbed most of the way home, and until I fell asleep on Monday night. And Dave wasn't very comforting as he was fed up from the 700 odd mile journey, so I felt really lonely.

Not too bad now though, because I've started looking at flights for February half term! The lovely French school system are giving me two weeks off, but there's no way we're gonna drive that again until we're coming home for good. So we will be sans voiture and everyone out there with cars needs to be very generous with lifts please : )

So now it's time for major French crackdown. I've been a bit lazy so far, but I'm gonna watch French TV as much as possible and learn new words every day. I'm also going to try and eat in the dining hall with the teachers more (only done it twice or three times so far because I don't like the food - it's pretty much set meals and all fish/meat, rice and veg) They did have burgers on the menu once, but I bet they weren't bloody cooked properly! : P

I would like to invite my favourite English teacher and her husband around for a meal because I am absolutely amazing at French after a drink or two! Plus this way Dave could join in the conversation as well.

The snow is spreading across the Channel now, and I presume it's going to get worse before it gets better. It took us twice as long to get to school today because we had to drive the long way round on the main roads and we had to drive at 10mph.

I taught my first lesson where 12 pupils out of about 30 were in, and then the teachers said I might as well go home because there were even less for my afternoon lessons (only 2 or 3 of the younger class as a lot of buses hadn't been running. Some of the older ones live in town)

I'm getting the blame for all of the snow! "It's Kim's fault, she brought it all from England!"

We got back and cleared all the snow from the pavement in front of of house. We've been told it's law in France, but we would have done it any way because by the time we got home at 10, every other bloody person the the little housing estate had already done it.

We were toying with the idea of making a French snowman, but we were wet and cold, and my gloves don't have any fingers! If the snow is still there tomorrow afternoon (and I'm pretty sure it will be), we might build a comedy snowman!